Wow... today was the first day I felt completely uncomfortable. I'll explain more later : )
Okay, it's later...
Monday, March 2
Where Am I?!?!?
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--The Samho Experience--
삼호서초등학교 (Samhoseo Elementary)
Sunday night, I was rushing around trying to make everything perfect for my first day of class on Monday. People kept telling me that the first impression will set the tone for the whole year, so I was feeling the pressure. I went to bed still a bit nervous, but excited to finally meet the kids and get my first dose of what teaching English in a Korean elementary would be like.
When I arrived to school at 9am, 김선생님(awesome teacher), told me to sit at my desk in the teacher's office. My coteacher then came up to me and told me that I won't teach until next Monday! And that I should stay at the desk. I was surprised/sad/relieved/confused/etc. No one in the office spoke very much English, so I honestly had no idea what I was supposed to do. I read my Bible and went on facebook, lol. I kept looking around hoping someone would say something to me. Periodically I tried to ask if I was supposed to be doing something, but they just told me to stay there. Of course this was more like me trying to use broken Korean and them trying to use broken English, and lots of pauses and confused faces, and then settling for what I thought was what they were trying to tell me.
We then had lunch, and I was told (by a pretty good English speaker, finally!) that I would introduce myself to all the teachers in a meeting at 4pm, so I should prepare something to say. During lunch, I sat and ate, and no one talked to me. Not even my new English-speaking teacher friend. I felt like they were thinking, "why does this girl have to be here? she has no personality, and people basically have to take care of her." After lunch I went home to change for the afternoon meeting and to calm my nerves. I also began making lists of Korean words and phrases I was desperately needing that day.
The meeting was the best part of the day, because I met another new teacher, who also had decent English, and she translated for me as I introduced myself to the teachers. I felt like I could finally show that I have things to say and that I am not just some quiet, personality-less little girl. And people acknowledged me more after that, which was great.
Whew! I like to be hopeful and optimistic, but this is honestly how I felt yesterday and ugh, it was painful! I think I finally felt some of the culture shock I was waiting for, and it was exhausting, overwhelming, and lonely. I prayed a lot that day, and despite the crazy day, He reminded me of how greatly He has provided for me:
There are some people here in Samho who have been amazing to me. One teacher took me into her home when I didn't have a place to stay the first night and she continues to make sure I am accommodated while I am at school. My homestay family is so wonderful. I can't even list everything they've done for me, but to name a few, they try to make things I like, the mother is teaching me Korean, and they will not let me touch the dishes! Oh and the 6th grader is SO adorable.. I love him! My two Korean scholar partners are there for me and have helped me a lot, and I know they will be my close friends as this year progress. And other teachers have been helpful and really welcoming to me.
One day at a time! The Lord himself has gone before me, and will be with me; He will never leave me nor forsake me. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged. Deut 31:8 Amen. The Lord has a purpose for me here, and as weak, insecure, and unqualified as I am, even I cannot stop His work! Praise the Lord for that fact!!
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5 comments:
wow really? today, and not when you went au naturale in the jjimjjimbang? haha can't wait to hear about it =b
:) yinting was here
always great to hear how things are going! christie "aja, aja, paiting!"
Christie...keep your chin up! Remember who you belong too and who He is!! I'm glad this is becoming such an awesome experience for you!! - jae
hey christie-
i'm so encouraged by your post. =] there are times here at home when i feel like life is too easy (or even when it gets a little frustrating/tough, that i can handle it on my own), and i end up not seeing God in my life. so hearing about your experience just reaffirms God's goodness for me. i'm glad He is just showing Himself more to you everyday. love you christie! and i am praying for you =]
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